Starting Off

I have to just say that I should have done this 3 months ago. I started to seriously consider losing weight AGAIN!!! at the beginning of June. I weighed 267. Before that I had gotten to 285. Here is my profile on Lose It
Over weight and Tired of it. Have lost probably close to 1000 lbs in my life :) of course I've gained 1100 lbs. :) about 2 years ago I couldn't figure out why I was thirsty all the time and had to go "pee" all the time. Went to the doctor because my face was breaking out and told him about my "thirst" problem. They checked my blood sugar. The next day he called and told me to come in Immediately! I did and he told me, "you should be in a coma right now!" He then began to tell me that I was a diabetic. I told him "No I am not a diabetic" He looked puzzled at me and said, "well your blood sugar is off the charts and you should be in a coma. Normal Sugar is 70 - 80 and yours is 350. Your A1C is 12.1 and it should be at 6-7. so you are a diabetic" I looked him straight in the face and said "I AM NOT A DIABETIC, I might have an issue with my blood sugar because All I do is eat Junk and sweets" He told me, "if you don't change your diet, you are as good as dead, or going to be getting shots the rest of your life!" I told him I would change. He suggested a 1600 cal/day diet and I said, what the heck make it a 1200. :) I lost 25 lbs the first month by cutting all sugars, all breads, all tortillas, all corn, all potatoes, out of my life. Completely. I lost another 15 lbs the next month because I started eating whole grain bread and only lost 15 the next month. I went from 267 to 215 in 3 months. Drastic!! yep.. my doctor was very shocked and very excited for my health. I began to sneak a sweet here and there so I maintained the 215 for a month, started eating a flour tortilla here and there. Then the holidays hit. I thought couldn't deprive myself of all the Thanksgiving Pies and bread and then Christmas Sweets, Chocolates. Stopped paying attention. Stopped checking my blood sugar because test strips were over a $1 a piece. Next thing I know I'm just watching my night sweats and making sure they weren't getting to the point that they were. But before I knew it I was weighing 260 then 265 and the heartburn started. Tried to cut back here and there but couldn't lose. Get focused and lose 5 lbs, celebrate and gain 7. My son kept on me about being able to push his kids around in a wheel barrow like my dad did him. I realized I could not go on like this. So finally, I have decided that I cannot live like this anymore and so I'm going to change it. I'm going to live a healthy life. A friend from Church told me about this site but I couldn't get to it on my phone so I just blew it off. But after prodding from my Son, I found it on line and I'm logging. I appreciate everyone's support. Please friend me if you find me on here.
In a nut shell.. I was FAT.. no getting around it.. I WAS FAT!! The little fat waddling guy at church. The guy that everyone knew was jovial and fat. Heavy. "big boned" nooo.. Just FAT. When you have to struggle to breathe.. you are FAT. Pretty harsh but truthful. Does that mean you are a lower form of life and not worthy of Love.. NOOOOO It does not, it means you need to start loving your self and taking care of what God has given you and treat it correctly.
Oh I have done Diets.. Lots of Diets.. Cambridge Diet, Low Carb Diet, Cabbage Diet, Herbal Life Diet, Fit or Fat Diet, Stop eating after 6pm diet, Let's see.. I think I have lost count.. oh Weight Watchers diet.. Not that any of those diets are bad, except the Cambridge Diet (people were dying on that diet), it's just that they are Diets and unless they are complete changes in your thinking and life style they will work as long as you are ON THEM. I've been told that anything becomes a habit after it is done for 21 days. I have to say true except for "diets" because of the thought process with the word "diet", you see we hear that word and we immediately think "temporary". OK well that's what I do. diet = temporary.
However, after much thought and introspection, I realized that it could no longer be a diet but a change to my life. A complete change. No longer would I live to eat, but I would now get it in my head that I was to eat to live and nothing more. Don't get me wrong. I love FOOD!!! I LOVE FOOD!!! I LOVE LASAGNA!!! I LOVE FLOUR TORTILLA's!!! I LOVE CHOCOLATE!!! I LOVE PIZZA!!! I LOVE CAKE, PIE, ICE CREAM, COBBLER, PEANUT BUTTER, CHIPS, CORN, POTATOs, BREAD, STEAK, EVERYTHING THAT IS FOOD!!!! people say "you can't LOVE food." I disagree!!! When it becomes an obsession, I think it's a warped kind of love :) ROFL!!!
Okay. Now that I got that out, I feel like I can start to review maybe what it was that got me to this point. WHO TO BLAME? WHO TO BLAME?!!!! ME!!!! Next Post.. a little about the progress but thoughts about the what brought me to this point.